Monday, February 4, 2013


Wow it's been a long time since I posted anything on my blog.  I've missed writing and watching my thoughts scroll across the screen of my monitor.  And I don't particularly enjoy them banging around in my head and making a mess of my headspace that would make the sternest psychologist cringe.

I've given up writing for the past couple of months simply because I've been discouraged.  Nothing outwardly has changed all that much, but I've just felt an inner disillusionment with life and God.  I'm tired of hearing I need to change and I'm tired of waiting to change.

I struggle with all sorts of things, feeling like I'm coming up short in so many areas of my life.  But there's something that this process (of seeing my shortcomings) has enabled me to do.   Even while I've felt sad and discouraged I've dared to hope.  So I guess I'd say I've been both discouraged and encouraged.

With hope I was reading on Abraham and I noticed just how much of his story is God's story.  God is the main actor in Abraham's life.  And it's not ego-centric activity, it's beautiful activity of selfless love.  God's character traits pop out as if from behind a curtain in these OT accounts.

Just check out his first address to Abraham: "Go from your country and your kindred and your father's house to the land that I will show you.  And I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing.  I will bless those who bless you, and him who dishonors you I will curse, and in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed."

This blessing makes me think that it's a very, very good thing that God is a "covenantal" God.  I've heard that term batted around a lot, and I frankly often don't know what it means.  But in God's covenants I see both a God who is willing to condescend in his dealings with man but also a God who privileges man with absolute undeserved devotion.

A lot of people talk about there's or others' devotion to God.  But really, God is devoted to himself I know, but his devotion to himself comes through us and is towards us.  We are super-loved.  

Now that I think about it, that may be the defining characteristic of the Christian - that a person is super-loved.

So as I seek to pick back up this experiment in blogging, or wandering thoughts making there way into cyber print, I'm hoping in this God's super-love.